Hot take: if there’s anything that feels as good as feeling good, it’s crying in the shower. Not to be confused with the tears that crop up on your birthday or while sitting in the car, crying in the shower is a different kind of release. It’s therapeutic, restorative, and honestly rejuvenating, too.
It’s not that I enjoy feeling sad or crying over a fictional creature in “House of the Dragon,” per say – crying in general sucks and leaves me with a pounding headache and a snotty nose – but the release I feel after letting it all out in the shower specifically helps me feel more balanced and centered. I feel like a new woman when I’m done.
“Participating in a shower cry can feel almost ceremonial – it’s a way of acknowledging and shedding some of those built-up emotions from throughout the day,” psychotherapist Brianna Paruolo says. “The act of literally washing your body while releasing emotions can create a powerful sense of cleansing, both physically and emotionally.”
Below, Paruolo explains more about why crying in the shower feels so damn good.
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Brianna Paruolo is a licensed psychotherapist and founder of On Par Therapy.
Why Does Crying in the Shower Feel So Good?
One reason why crying in the shower may feel so good is because of the sensory details. “The shower’s warm water and white noise can be comforting, creating a cocoon-like environment that feels protective and nurturing,” Paruolo says. Not only does the warm water hit my forehead, alleviating any potential headache from forming, but the steam from the hot shower relieves my runny nose. Physically, there’s no better setting to cry than in the shower.
On an emotional level, the shower also provides the perfect private setting to cry without fear of judgment, Paruolo says. “It’s a safe space where you can be truly alone with your emotions.”
When I’m crying in the shower, I’m not worried about who can hear me or what kind of sounds I’m making. I’m simply releasing all the emotions I’ve held on to that day.
For these reasons, Paruolo often encourages her clients to “wash the day away,” whether that involves a shower cry or not. This helps people quite literally wash away the stressors and anxiety that may have impacted them earlier. When you’re finished and you walk out of the shower, it’s like a reset. Your day can start over and you can move on.
Of course, crying itself is not usually a fun or enjoyable experience, but it’s a necessary one that helps you “connect with your feelings, which is healthy, natural, and important for emotional well-being,” Paruolo says. And personally, if crying is inevitable, I’d rather do it in the shower where I can smell like Dove body soap than anywhere else.
Although a shower cry is my preferred way to let out some tears, it’s OK if it’s not your go-to method. “There’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ place to cry,” Paruolo says. “What matters is that you’re allowing yourself to process your emotions.” It just so happens that I love processing my emotions while I’m shampooing, conditioning, shaving, and washing my body.
Taylor Andrews is a Balance editor at PS who specializes in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, and more. In her six years working in editorial, she’s written about how semen is digested, why sex aftercare is the move, and how the overturn of Roe killed situationships.
